I <3 HBB........

Okay, how cheezy was that?

I drop off the face of the earth and that is all that I can come up with for a title. Man I have lost my blogging mojo!

Well, I'm back. Eating chocolate as I type this and wondering just how much more it will add to the 6 pounds I gained over the past week. Let me tell you folks, I enjoyed gaining them. As you may know, I had a visit from a certain Hot British Boy (HBB). Yeah, who knew, right? So he came to visit, we ate too much, and I'm terribly twitterpated! But all you can eat buffets at casinos are never a good idea despite whatever else you are doing to burn off those horrendous calories! Buffets are evil... but on a side note, and small moment of pride, I did eat heaps but I didn't just plow through all of the crap I put on my plate. For the first time in forever I didn't eat food just because it was there.

Of course, I'm in the PMS, pity party phase of my month right now and I've had more chocolate and EEK! Ben and Jerry's in the last few days than I have in all of last year. It's doing wonders for my body let me tell you. I guess I hadn't realized how sensitive I'd become to sugar and such. Ooooh it throws me out of whack! I can just feel my skin crawling right now after my consumption of chocolate Easter eggs -- you know the kinds with the hard shell, but not the M&M hard shell? Add to all of this that HBB has come and gone and won't be back until July (WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!) and I'm a walking disaster.

At least I have pinpointed my major dieting/control issue. I am an emotional eater folks. Who knew? I am having a really hard time getting it under control right now. (Side note: next time HBB is here, we are eating better. Period. Now that I know he loves me and I don't have to woo him with my cooking!) I've felt this way before, that's for sure -- but I'm not so sure I've ever really figured out a good way to get it back together again. Sigh...lots of deep breaths, methinks.

On top of all this, I only have 4 sessions left with PT. A few weeks ago, I was dreading this -- now, I think I'm actually ready. I really think I've learned what I need to. I think I disappointed PT because I didn't lose weight as fast as he wanted me to. I think he's given up on me to be honest. It kind of pisses me off. But then, I guess just like we can get wrapped up in the scale, others can get wrapped up in their measures of success. I've certainly gotten a lot out of my time with him and I know that I will have a hard time pushing myself as hard as he pushes me. But I certainly will be able to manage! As a teacher I should understand this -- that there is always a point when your student is ready to go out on their own. It's time. I'm sick of him, he's sick of me.

And let's face it peeps, I can't afford it any more. Even more to the point, I guess I'm at a point where I need to figure out what exactly it is I want from this. I've certainly turned my life around these past few months. Now I'm back at that point where I need to set goals and revisit where it is I want to go. Hmmm, you mean you were meant to actually assess these things from time to time???

Yes Fat Grl, you are.

Ahh, yes well maybe that's my problem! That assessment/readjustment piece.

It's getting late though so this is going to have to wait until manana.

It's good to be back..........

TTFN,
FGS